Gabriella Godoy Gabriella Godoy

Psychodynamics: A Foundation for Living Inquiry

‘A PHILOSOPHY OF HAMMERS‍ ‍

I’ll begin as so many have been motivated to begin, by exposing a lie.
To do this, a little history is needed.
The middle and late 1800s in Europe were rich with philosophical development, driven by development in scientific thought (Darwin’s natural selection) and movement toward empiricism and skepticism, away from metaphysical trends which had dominated the field for so long. 
Friedrich Nietzsche arrives on this scene ready to deal blows. Among other projects he set upon exposing the subject-object distinction (I am I, that is that, I cause that, x causes y) as a useful feature of what is human, human-all-too-human, rather than a feature of some some objective or metaphysical 'reality.' Simultaneously his ideas also challenged the foundation of mechanical materialism and axiomatic philosophy including religious philosophy. It’s not important to know exactly what any of these terms mean. What’s important is that Nietzsche challenged many foundational systems of thought upon which European culture itself rested, while it was simultaneously being challenged by other emerging philosophies like the pragmatism of Charles Sanders Pierce and William James. Something was clearly in the air at the time.
As a philologist, Nietzsche’s work located all of this as dynamic process within the human itself. He stops asking, “What is the right way to interpret reality?” and starts asking, “What happens when we treat interpretation itself as the only reality?” He asks whether philosophers really know anything at all, especially of themselves. He treated philosophy as symptom of the philosopher, rather than evaluating its truth or falsity. The human does not aim to access “reality;” it finds use in an interpretation; it interprets its environment to some end, and that interpretation reveals a truth about the human and how it relates to environment. The content of ideas is not treated as true or false, the ideas themselves are treated as processes-to-be-interpreted-within-reality. This already is a powerful paradigm shift that qualifies and scaffolds much of the psychoanalytic movement.
The second layer might be even more fascinating. Nietzsche’s method operates inside this new epistemology. He presents the core aspects of his philosophy itself as analytic material, not truth claims. He wanted contact, participation, transmutation, tension, aliveness. He wanted his philosophy to have working legs so it might walk with us.
At the heart of his philosophy is a hammer. He strikes the pages as they ring in thunderous prompts, questions, not statements or claims. They roll through the valleys and mountains all around us but never resolve. They enter and rattle the skeleton before we can defend against them. We try to circumnavigate them, mute them, kill them, idealize them, maybe even stumble after them in longing for what movement they promised. All of that, what happens in us as these hammer blows reverberate, IS the philosophy.
Epistemology/Perspectivism: “SUPPOSING truth were a woman, WHAT THEN?” This might be his most stylish blow. Here he critiques traditional epistemology with a Koan. This question does not ask for an answer. You can feel it. It is meant to be experienced. The way the question moves through me is like this: what does it mean for our lives if truth is a process, a dialectic, a relationship, rather than a fixed state or object? If a truth is a truth, just lying there waiting to be discovered, it is inanimate. But a woman is alive, a human who cannot be seen or known at a glance. You know her though relating to her many, many times though dynamic exchange. Her nature and aims will not explain themselves to you in the form of  any language she could speak to you, or any observations you make in any moment. You come to know these by enacting many movements together, feeling your own experience in movements. "You have to get involved if you want to come to know the truth."  This is maybe one of the most delightful aspects of his philosophy: he built in compassionate  barriers that some simply cannot cross. We can see that if a person is different in this way or that way, they inevitably experience this prompt differently in exactly those ways.  In this relational dialectic the reader's experience is part of the philosophy. In this sense it is not one philosophy, but as many philosophies as there are readers. This way of organizing philosophy directly challenged a long standing philosophical tradition that framed knowledge as “understanding of what is real.” Nietzsche asks, “What if the human organism can’t 'know reality' at all, but is itself a functional movement of reality? How would this change what we have called "philosophy?” 
Eternal recurrence: WHAT IF a demon were to whisper in your ear the terrible secret that this exact life you live now will repeat into infinity? Eternal recurrence uses a thought experiment as an amplification device. Your life will repeat, exactly as it occurred, forever. What does your life feel like when you consider this? Do you value it more? Less? How does it change your decisions? Can you tolerate it? No answer is provided.
The Will to Power: again a refusal of anything defined or fixed. Even his broadest and most encompassing “concept” is no concept at all, but a process of engagement, a movement through contact, dialectic that leads toward a more alive experience.
Ubermesch: “WHAT IF we adopt a collective project for our future, and that project were the overman?”  Overman is not the aim. We’re asked to consider what would be revealed if the human collectively tried to overcome itself?”
All of this moves away from fixed concept, statement, fixed reality, truth, and toward a model in which everything is a living process. It’s this exact movement away from previous iterations of epistemology that establishes Nietzsche as the first psychoanalyst: truth as interpretive function of reality, which is described by participating in it rather than referring to it from the outside. All behavior and experience can now be treated as symptom, interpretation, sign, signal about how the the organism is becoming and overcoming itself. The the contribution of the analyst is no exception.
This is, fundamentally, the foundation for psychoanalysis.

FREUD SMELLS FISHY

Secondly, this history sets the stage for a lie which might have misattributed the origin of psychodynamics to Freud, who is largely credited as the “father” of this movement. The foundations of Freud's ideas about internal drives and repression/displacement were largely established by Nietzsche, who also operated within the very analytic framework Freud claimed to be pioneering. Freud’s work also built upon emerging ideas in other areas like physiology (Ernst von Bruck), but we have hard evidence of Nietzsche’s profound and direct influence on Freud. Direct paraphrases and citations of Nietzsche in Freud’s formal work, Paneth’s long letters to Freud about Nietzsche, records of Lou Salome introducing Nietzsche’s work to Freud, Freud’s letters to Zweig about Nietzsche, methodological scaffolding that had only been built by Nietzsche’s work at that time, Freud’s later credit to Nietzsche as possessing "...a more penetrating knowledge of himself than any other man who ever lived or was likely to live." All of this is now a matter of public record, and contact with Nietzsche’s work is evident even very early in Freud’s life and writings, but Freud repeatedly and publicly denied this. We can only speculate about why. Many scholars seem to gravitate toward an interpretation that sounds like, “Freud might have wanted to separate himself from the philosophical tradition in order to establish something more concrete, testable, physiological, scientific." I find this motive less plausible than narcissism, stolen valor and strategic maneuvering to be credited (on Freud’s part).  Imagine Freud, an infant in front of Nietzsche's breadth and depth, pointing to Nietzsche's collapse at the end then commenting, "He must not have known himself well enough after all if he could not stop this," while parading himself in the false garb of Freidrich's life and work--which he longs more than anything to have been able to do himself. I can feel it in Freud's writings. He was full of contradictions and self deceptions which he could not access. Maybe I'm right about this, maybe not; but this says more about me than the “truth” of what transpired. This snaps the psychoanalytic process back to the forefront for us.

METHODS AND MOTHERS

My interpretation of Freud itself is live analytic material. What am I expressing through this label, "intellectual theft?” What force, what stimulus, what internal feelings necessitated the conviction in me that this object [“taking credit for others’ ideas] is purely and intensely bad. There is so much disgust and disdain in my language. This conviction reflects that I find my experience of this object intolerable. What specifically is intolerable to me? How did I come to experience it this way?
In contemporary psychodynamics, we now seem to agree that following this thread tends to lead back to recurring patterns of experience during developmental periods of life. Following this dialectic would expose something about the human animal, Devin, and how that whole animal is organizing toward its aims. In short, any action I take in the present, including this sentence, is itself live material to be interpreted. This method is the foundation of modern psychoanalysis, even today. If we had more information about my experience in that moment of intolerance, we might be able to establish a psychodynamic hypothesis.
We already have clues. I said I interpreted Freud’s behavior as motivated by “narcissism and maneuvering”: he read Nietzsche, was enamored of his work, considered him a genius, was moved by that to produce his own work, but could never face he had not generated the foundations for that work. Instead of properly individuating from Nietzsche, Freud stole his foundation then confabulated that he never encountered it.
Here we can already see a dynamic moving in me: bad object becomes enamored —> realizes incompetence —> fails to contain shame —> self disparages —> steals out of ambition or resentment —> confabulation (inner deception) —> lie (outward deception) —> someone is harmed.
We might then ask, “What felt least tolerable about this dynamic in that moment to you?” 
I answer: “He could have borne the cost of his shame, inside his own organism, in his failure to generate something that felt significant and true to him, but instead he compensated for it without considering the cost to others.” Now a much clearer theme emerges. It’s no longer about this specific theft, it’s about how I’m interpreting this pattern. This also reveals a visceral element. I seem to be saying the cost is at the level of the body and psyche (‘inside the organism’).
Next we might ask, “Can you remember any experiences, especially early in life, when you experienced this pattern?”
I answer: “Yes, clearly. I can remember my mother inflating her accomplishments to strangers, to us, claiming credit for work she didn’t do, making herself a hero in every story. Even her personality itself was a lie through and through. She didn’t seem to care about the impact she had on anyone’s experience outside of what it did to or for her. She brought disaster to the lives of countless people including her own children, and has never once apologized for any harm she caused. She can’t even articulate it. The most she can manage is, “Yeah… I was going through a hard time in the past.” When her deception and malice are questioned or exposed with facts, she lies, confabulates, and becomes aggressive (much like Freud did when questioned about Nietzsche) yet still holds herself in very high regard including morally and socially (Freud got away with it and was recognized). But her psyche would not let her reflect on any of this; it was all unconscious movement (Freud's confabulation, ironic lack of self awareness as he comments on Nietzsche's collapse). This left me with a confusing and distressing experience of my mother in my body, a resentment toward her which feels to still hold tension in me.
What’s clear from this last answer is that my experience of Freud’s behavior shares a strong structural dynamic with how I chronically experienced my mother. The working hypothesis becomes: Devin might be experiencing Freud, at least in part, through the internal dynamics he formed with his mother. 
We’ll stop the analysis there, but if we wanted to probe further we would look at specific ways I experienced these patterns in my mother as harmful—intolerable affect states, cognitive thought, impulses, internal sensations, etc.—exploring what kind of impacts this had on the way I organized my experiences and decisions going forward.
What I believe about Freud could plausibly be true of him, or not. But my interpretation of him, the way I relate to him as an internal object (see Melanie Klein), is itself a truth about me. Psychoanalysis is fundamentally a relational process. We move through that process, without an end point or conclusion, and this exposes something about the internal dynamics of the psyches involved. What I did here demonstrates that psychoanalytic method in real time. All contributions to the relational field (what’s arising in experience presently between the patient and analyst) can be treated as live material to be analyzed through dialectic.
This was a revelation at the time. The emergence of psychodynamics as a field can be seen not only as an emergent phenomenon of 19th century Europe’s economy of philosophical and scientific thought, but also as a product of the social dynamics and psyches of the humans who engaged with these ideas. They expanded, built up, tore down, reorganized, stole and borrowed from each other in their efforts to break through similar thresholds under similar cultural tensions. Nietzsche might have framed his own contribution as a necessary discharge of disruptive force, a “plough” of perspective that upturned many presumptions about the process of interpretation—repositioning interpretation itself as the process to be interpreted.
In the upturned soil behind that plough bloomed more development. The late 19th and early 20th century produced a cascade of thinkers and practitioners—Freud, Jung, Adler, Klein, Bion, Winnicott—who expanded and applied this method of inquiry to clinical-relational work in the way I demonstrated above. It would no doubt be very valuable to cover their lives, perspectives and contributions to the field, and maybe there will be space for this in the future. What I want to communicate to you now, though, is something about the process itself and how it functions in practice.

FEELINGS AND FATHERS

Fundamentally: I can view any given pattern of undesired experience or behavior in me as two sides of my own face in a mirror. I turn my head to look at the left side and I see a symptom of a failure to resolve some process of individuation; I turn to the other side and see movement toward resolution of that very same failure.
Here I’ll need to mention Jung briefly, as his notion of individuation is central to the field. He posited the aim of psychoanalysis as moving the individual toward an experience and expression of whole self, in both conscious and unconscious life, through dialectic. Later thinkers differed in their description psychoanalysis, like Winnicott who centered the process around “continuity of spontaneous being,” (personally I’m very attracted to this framing) but in my view these other ways of thinking about the function of psychoanalysis are very compatible and not contradictory to what Jung calls individuation.
Examples tend to help, so let’s walk through one.
Meet Jessica. She is product of my imagination, but let’s pretend she is real and I have direct access to Jessica’s inner experience. Jessica experienced her father as never caring about her inner emotional life as a child. When she shared challenging emotions, her father consistently had no comment and showed no affective empathy for her experience. The same was true for her other sensations like pain or discomfort. This often left her feeling unsafe, confused, and in physical pain when trying and failing to process her emotions alone.
Now Jessica takes it very personally and reacts defensively when she perceives a man as disinterested in her feelings. She holds the hurt still because it was intolerable to feel it at the time; it might have collapsed her. As an adult Jessica desperately wants to be understood and heard by men with authority on an emotional level. This could be a drive toward a need that was not met in her development. Her organism might be seeking this as part of its individuation process: “To become my own person, to become myself, I must internally integrate a paternal archetype that can see and contain my true feelings.”
Jessica feels compelled to test this in many exchanges with men. Sometimes she does this with women too. When she experiences her emotions as not acknowledged or respected, she feels angry and accuses the other of not caring about her or about feelings generally. Sometimes this dynamic leads to unexpected conflicts, and she struggles to understand why this undesirable experience is repeating for her.
Hypothesis: Jessica learned early in life that her father did not care about her inner life or feelings. This internal dynamic transfers to scenarios in the present that feel similar to her. If true, that might be a very difficult lesson to process and resolve. Her experience and behaviors in the present might be viewed from one angle as a attempt to process, resolve, reframe, defend against the repetition of 'suffering-while-longing-to-be-in-contact-with-the-paternal,' and so on.
Jessica could be expecting, hoping her accusation will be met with disconfirming evidence: “No, of course I care, Jessica, let me do better and prove it to you.” Now she could live in a world that corrects for the longing she feels for paternal contact. This would offer her evidence of care.  Unfortunately this reassurance requires Jessica to leverage her anger and accusations to achieve that experience. Further, the hurt from her past was likely enormous, the size she felt her father to be when she was a child, so any disconfirming evidence in the present will likely fail to survive the scale of that stress test. For Jessica it might not be about evidence at all, but about resolving feelings of danger and loneliness based on what she has learned in development about the world [her father]. She could be seeking to fill a deficit of reassurance and support that she is feel safe to feel her pwn experience, now trying to force the world to provide that reassurance by showing it her teeth. 
The same pattern of experience and behavior has a dual function: enacting a trauma, and seeking its resolution. If this is exposed to Jessica through the analytic process she can have a clearer view of what she requires to move toward individuation (Jung), safe contact with her felt experience, continuity of spontaneous being (Winnicott), or however you frame the function of this process. She can feel and process those experiences in a way that moves her toward a more whole experience off her self and her life.

CONCLUSION

Every movement or expression of force can be viewed as a fission, fracture, separation, and distinction; but also as fusion, integration, cooperation and unification. When an object is split in experience (see Klein, paranoid schizoid position) into all good/all bad, this represents both a fracture and a repair. The split is a solution to a developmental or survival frustration, or both. The split also generates distortion, and consequences for that distortion in the future. This is not a contradiction or problem to be solved; it is a description of function, of force dynamics occurring in everything. All movement is both a departure and arrival; a moving away, and moving toward; a symptom of the organism’s frustrations, and a process of overcoming those frustrations.
One of the most important lesson I’ve taken from my own psychodynamic process and studies is that a good and fulfilling life requires me to process big, profound, often painful experience. I’m learning to view my emotional world as carrying important signals of meaning and direction, rather than disturbances or signals that something is wrong. My various negotiations with reality, the ways I fracture myself and the world into distortions, are all also truths. Psychodynamics offers a process of moving toward my own aliveness. Where and how was I fractured? How did I organize around that? How is that working for me now? Can I stay in play?
This process can be, and is perhaps by definition, painful. Many of our fractures actually defend against the collapsing force of intolerable experience. It was intolerable then, but now how much can I symbolize, feel, and think about it?
We find in the wreckage of our split selves both a past solution and an invitation to reorganize for the future. There we’ll find our deepest sorrows, fractures--along with our highest joys--frustrated, frozen deep in the unconsciousness, unable to move toward contact with anything alive. The analytic process occupies the present in between, where we get clues as we watch all of this play out in the textures of the moment.
Will you stay and steady me
while I go to a place where I discover 
tiny games in the grass
screeches of wonder where I gasp in
the movements before my eyes 
which lilt down through me
slingshot around my diaphragm 
through my vocal chords 
slicing the clean air 
where they rattle the skulls of big people 
who wince and look sideways at each other 
and inhale through their teeth 
and wish I would disappear?
I want to look for something there
Can you stand by as I’m slumped over
by my crystal elation hurled back 
into my abdomen, its cleaved edges
now a tempest of razors
Can you watch as I learn again
that my highest atmospheres
cast me out of love?
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Gabriella Godoy Gabriella Godoy

Current Perspective On Narrative Excavation

Maybe at greater scale than ever before we now collectively face the weight, even the necessity of integrated self development. I mean this in the embarrassing way philosophers tend to deconstruct phrases: the self requires development.
This must be done through a combination of courageous social integration and introspection. The self must be felt as an agent with choice over action and impact, but this is meaningless in isolation. The self is interdependent with village, attuned to village, impacted by village. It vibrates not as a single note but as a string among many which form chords or disharmonies. And those sounds move in progressions, fluttering colorfully across unseen causal chains and impossible stretches of land. Littered across the earth and its histories are archeological imprints of collective trauma processing and paths of collective growth—vague, badly recorded, but deeply resonant imprints. Those societal progressions and regressions replay as songs again and again in our collective memory, the ruins left by grand designs and even grander decadence. This is why so many men report to “often think about Rome” today. They aren’t playing into a viral trend, they are mediums through which cultural memory is expressed. There is something about these ancient cultures that beckon us back to lost understandings. This is not a picture of lost advanced civilizations or aliens, though all of these are possible. In my view the issue is far less tangible, more covert and insidious. Unfortunately our governments and institutions with affiliated interests—like the psychiatric and psychoanalytic traditions—position ‘self’ as the problem in isolation, the individual as ill; the individual as misbehaving; the individual as ‘disordered; the individual as scapegoat.
Personal accountability is a useful but false heuristic, a lens through which we can look and see space for different choices. But we don’t actually make choices, in my view. We experience choices; we ride them like waves, but there is no locus of control. The self is a symptom. It is a symptom of its hereditary predispositions and the demands placed upon its living materials by environment. It is a symptom of the collective—its blindnesses, its frenzied violences, its most enormous shames, awes, hopes and loves. Perhaps my mentor would put it this way: it’s obvious that humans are a force, a will, a drive, but whence came the notion that such a will is free to choose differently?
My view is that we cannot change the will, the drive, the essence of life force, but we can change how it is expressed. We can change its strategy. We can move into greater and more sustainable expressions of power through connection and alignment on the qualities of life, rather than its quantities. Today its obvious our species has been hijacked by fear and fixation on quantities. Nearly every societal frame—from family systems, to civic duty, to industry and infrastructure itself—orients individual action to fear. These fears take three primal shapes:
I am bad
I am alone
I am in danger
These are the three mechanisms of inner and outer control. They are also the levers that move shame. When we face these fears, we integrate; when we suppress them, or are forced to suppress them, we fracture. It’s actually that simple.
These fears are the innate mechanisms by which we suppress and contort the self and other. When we allow these fears to govern us, they preserve us temporarily, maybe, typically based on a very biased assumptions, and certainly at the cost of many unwanted side effects—but sometimes it's worth it. Most of the time, though, it isn’t. It has simply become a default. Allowing these fears to govern us leads to greater and greater fracture, vivisection of self from soil and from social relationships, vivisection of self from living systems that support self.
When these fears are integrated the social individual naturally gravitates toward pro social values. Go figure. This is the raw center of the work we do.
Expose and integrate the primal fears.
Map and fully feel the impact of these fears, the resulting patterns formed through experienced and the nature of our attachment to fear patterns.
Integrate this new awareness and capacity into an embodied value framework.
When this work is done well, we take longer, more deliberate and natural strides in creative and constructive expression—rather than compulsively reacting to fear after fear. I saw the cost of these fear levers first in myself, and then for the next fifteen years was haunted by their ghosts in every pair of eyes I met. Most of us are badly impacted, even gravely damaged by current models of social cohesion. I believe we have reached the tipping point in this regard and need a new model for both self development and social cohesion.
This model should integrate physical, emotional, spiritual, and cognitive development. It must also address squarely, rather than bypass, the cultural illnesses which oppress the individual and have led us to this point of a great species-wide eruption of existential-level depression and rage. This is the aim of narrative excavation as a methodology and my own aim as mentor. But my audience knows this, I suspect. I’d guess most of you all know this isn’t about a brand or money. There are much easier and less heartbreaking ways to build those. This is about building practices that meet the actual needs of the organism and its social body, practices that actually move the variables that need to be moved.
In this way I see no separation whatsoever between physical and psychological practice. The “mind” is meant to reflect somatic experience; like the self it does not exist in isolation, and perhaps it doesn’t exist at all. In this light its obvious that “healing the mind” is healing the body. One will always be the bottleneck for the other, and one will always drag the other forward, even kicking and screaming. I’ve seen this many times: one facet of consciousness breaks through, and it drags the other out into the open with it. I reflect on my own life as a series of these breakthroughs and inquiries about the location of my spiritual bottlenecks—again and again, year after year. This is what I have been doing since 2012: testing, measuring, applying, adjusting, mapping, teaching, adjusting again.
Now here we are, in 2025, offering an evolving holistic model of mentorship centered in introspective practice.
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